The Tres Bogetos

18. 05. 03
posted by: Luke Mauer

Stuck in the rut when you're golfing and can't get over the hump?  No worries - The Tres Bogetos will come save the day!  The Tres Bogetos, better known as Dude, Where's My Par, is the golf league consisting of Alex Pulskamp, Kevin Koehne, and myself, Luke Mauer.  We are a bundle of fun with fireball, beer, vodka, oh, and a little golf.  But what's a guy supposed to do when his two teammates bail?  That was the situation this week at golf league.  I was left stranded as Kevin went to watch the 0-37 Reds and Alex went to Chicago for who knows what.  "Work" he says.  I had to call in a sub...a friend...the co-host to The Best Podcast You've Never Heard.  That's right.  Luke and Adam - but this time, on a team - like no other time in the history.  How would we do?

We headed out a little early to try to play a hole - it was a disaster.  Adam didn't know he was required to get a 6 pack so I could steal his ice for my mix drink.  We were off to a slow start.  We went to play a couple holes and end up right where we needed to be - but they were all booked.  People  flying around everywhere trying to get that practice in before the round.  So we settled for hole number 5.  On the Meadow.  (yes, the same Meadow I shot a 56 on just 5 days earlier).  It's the par 3, over the creek, green on a cliff that's falling desperately down.  I hit a tee shot to never be found and Adam's landed just short of the creek.  It was a bad start.  We putted around a bit on the green and then Adam wanted to try his 3 wood (as teeing off with his 5 iron was hurting the ego).  We each hit a couple shots and we were off to our first hole:  Meadow 8.

I teed off first - confident, poised.  We made a pact to never leave the other one stranded alone on a hole.  I hit my drive - it went 15 yards.  If the old guy we were playing against wasn't whistling - I could have done better.  Adam got up with his 5 iron - hit a very good, but high shot into the wind.  He still had 200+ left to the green.  Some errant shots here and there (and everywhere) led us to open with a double bogey - both of us.  The team we played against parred.  We were in trouble early.  But have no fear!  The Tres Bogetos were here - and this was an all too familiar position for our team.  I made a drink after my first tee shot and I was ready to do some work.  My tee shot on the 9th hole was much better, posting the furthest drive in a group full of opponents using driver.  I wound up parring the hole and we gained back a stroke.  Hole #1  Another beauty of a drive by me left the ball only 30 yards from the green.  Luckily for our opponents, my short game is as bad as....well my short game, and I wound up with a bogey.  I was upset, defeated, and we gave back a stroke as the old man rammed one home.  We were down 3 after 3 (and 3 over at that).  Par 5.  Those damn par 5s.  I teed up and hit a good shot, but it clipped a tree, then another.  I was in trouble.  Adam's eyes twinkled as he said those 5 special words to me "Can I use my driver?"  I said yes! *clapping*  He teed up and hit a hell of a drive to the 200 yard marker.  I fumbled around a bit but on Adam's second shot he hit a scorcher 200+ yards and it ran right up to the green.  An eagle putt.  I knew I was in good hands.  He blew the eagle putt pretty badly but hit an impressive comeback putt for birdie.  We gained one.  Down 2, 2 over after 4.  The next hole is where it all started to come together.  We just birdied and we were going to go on a tear.

On a tear we did.  We both had birdie putts on the 5th hole (Meadow 3) and both ended up parring.  On the 6th hole (Meadow 4), I hit a long putt for birdie as we took a commanding lead.  The 7th hole was that par 3 we practiced earlier.  The result for me was the same - bad.  But not Adam.  He hit it short then chipped it over, made a nice putt and salvaged a bogey on a difficult par 3.  The 8th hole was a struggle for me as well, but Adam blasted some shots and parred the Par 5 (going a combined 1 under on the 2 par 5s).  It was down to our last hole.  The par 3 (Meadow 7) into the woods.  I grabbed my 5 iron, with a strong 6 stroke lead, and I gave it my all.  A nice shot that bounced once and landed on the green.  Something I very rarely do.  A one putt would give us a birdie and a hell of a score.  I hit the putt and it looked good.  It looked great - but it wound up just a tad short for a gimme par.  We shook hands, we destroyed the competition - winning by 7 strokes after being down 2 through the first hole.  We finished 2 over, 38, killing our handicap for the rest of the season but having a damn good time doing it.  The Tres Bogetos was a force to be reckoned with if only for one Wednesday night.